Domestic violence, which is defined as “a person in an intimate relationship using a pattern of coercion and control, including physical, sexual, emotional or economic control, against the other person during the relationship and/or after the relationship has terminated ,” is an enormous problem in today’s society. In fact, in North Carolina it is the “number one public health issue facing women and children. ” While laws have been put into effect that provide for the safety and welfare of the abused parent, little consideration has been afforded to the children in these situations. Currently, amendments have been proposed to domestic violence laws which relegate custody to the “nonoffending primary caregiver. ” This takes into account the best interests of the children as well as the objective of the abused parent in leaving the relationship.

Courts should not ever give consideration to the idea of placing a child in the care and custody of an abuser. Studies have shown that “the best interest of the child is rarely, if ever, served by placing a child with a parent who is physically abusive to either a child or a child’s parent. ” The very idea of pl

It is important to look at the results of granting custody of any form to an abusive parent. The first thing that must be considered is the abusive parent’s intentions for wanting to have visitation with the child. In many cases, the batterer is simply “escalating his coercive control by filing for custody or visitation with the children. ” He is desperately trying to hold onto the control that was at the center of his abusive tendencies and since his spouse has decided to leave, control through the children is his only option. While some may think that an abuser would not be this desperate to maintain the control over his spouse, it is often the case. In fact, “fathers who batter mothers are more than twice as likely to seek sole custody of their children than non-violent fathers. ” Furthermore, the abuse victim has to worry that her children may not be returned safely to her at the end of the visitation. The obvious threat is that of physical danger to the child while in the care of the abuser. However, there is also another frightening threat to the safety of the child; kidnapping. It has been found that “more than fifty percent of child abductions result from situations involving domestic violence, and most of these abductions are perpetrated by fathers and their agents. ” Granting visitation to the abuser not only puts the welfare of the child in danger but also penalizes the abused spouse for leaving the relationship where, at least, she could try to control the abuse of her children.

Studies show, however, that there is a very strong correlation between spousal abuse and child abuse. In fact, a study by Lee H. Bowker, Michelle Arbitell and J. Richard McFerron which looked at 1,000 battered women found that “wife beaters abused children in 70% of the families. ” Even with statistics this compelling, many courts are overlooking the

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