There is no need for parents to pretend to their children that they have positive feelings for the former spouse. However, parents do need to support one another in their relationship with the children. In other words, each spouse must communicate to the children that the other is still their parent, cares for them deeply, and should be respected and obeyed. I

Parents are our most important teachers about relationships. All of us have gained important expectations about relationships from watching our parents’ daily interactions for many years. From our parents’ model we develop general “schemas” for what goes on between two people in close enduring relationships and learn expectations for what people can and cannot do together. Although we may relearn or alter these schemas as we develop further relationships, these first models are the most important determinants of the satisfaction we will find in later relationships. If a parent expresses anger at the former spouse by undermining the parenting authority of the other, the children will have very poor road maps to guide them through life.

Unconditional love for a child must come in the form of constant reassurance of your love and commitment to their well-being. They need to know that you will be there for them and that they are a top priority, even though you have additional responsibilities that require your time. They need to see concrete expressions of that love during the good time and the bad. In other words, they need to see that you love them just as much on their good days, as you do on their worst. The majority of divorces today appear to take place in low-conflict marriages, and the psychological damage to children f

Some topics in this essay:
, former spouse, former spouses, anger former spouse, role model, anger former, relationship parents, parenting authority, mother’s rejection, parents able, parental divorce,