Throughout the Confessions, love and wisdom, the desire to love and be loved, and his love for his mistress, are all driving forces for Augustine’s desire to find peace in God. Augustine uses love as his gate to God’s grace. Augustine often experiences darkness, blindness, and confusion while attempting to find harmony in God, but he knows that when he eventually finds Him, his restless heart will be saved. Beginging in his early childhood years, he struggled with a uneasy heart because he had to live in two different worlds. These worlds consisted of that of his mot

Saint Augustine searched for the answer of a question that asked if love reaches out hopelessly and harmfully, how can it turn around to be productive and wholesome to the human soul? The first love must be for the love of God in his mind. It must come before all other forms of love. Augustine states that, “The thought of you stirs him so deeply that he cannot be content unless he praises you, because you made us for yourself and our hearts find no peace until they rest in you” (I, 1). Augustine talks of many different forms of love. Another form that he talks about and demonstrates many times in the Confessions is the desire to love and to be loved. Augustine’s relation to his mistress focuses on the problem of restless loves, while showing that Augustine had the desire to love and the desire to be loved. For one thing, he went to Carthage wanting to be in love. He evidently was not in Carthage long before he found his mistress. Many young men stayed with a woman until the time came to marry them back then. This is what Augustine did. He states that, “In those days I lived with a woman, not my lawful wedded wife but a mistress whom I had chosen for no special reason but that my restless passions had alighted on her. But she was the only one and I was faithful to her” (IV, 4). Wisdom itself meant that the one true order of the world is what makes everything stick together. Augustine later recognized this as God’s truth and word, by which God had made all things. This wisdom came into the world as Christ. Augustine’s conversion is clear in outline and was greatly influenced by different variations of love. From childhood he had loved the name of Christ and associated with his mother about this and about her love for him. Also, when he read Cicero it summoned him to embrace the truth and love the wisdom of knowing the truth. He later experienced renewed love for the church and for Catholic things from Ambrose. Once God had come to him in compelling love, his surrender to a new life simply replaced, if it did not completely abolish, the old tormented division. The death of a very close friend of Augustine’s made him realize that all love shou

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