Every year, over one million children are involved in new divorce cases (Walter, et al. 79). It is estimated today that nearly half of all first-time marriages will fizzle out. In the mid nineteen hundreds, only about five percent of all marriages ended in divorce (Amato 1269). Divorce in the family marks the beginning of an uncertain future for children (Walter, et al. 74).

In the nineteen-eighties, the effects of divorce on children declined from the earlier decades. Researchers say that this is most likely due to the fact that divorce has become, in so many ways, much more socially accepta

Many children begin to commit strange and odd behavior during the divorce process. This typically means that the child is using its own emotions and strategies to make it through and attempt to accept the divorce experience. Berger notes that “parents should be alert for signs of any general behavior change in the child”(117). Changes may vary in occurrence any time from before the divorce to long after the divorce. Most children tend to use different methods of coping with the situation. These methods, known as defense mechanisms, make the hard times seem a little more bearable to the child (Berger 118).

A more common defense mechanism is acting out by the child. Berger notes acting out as being “Any form of deliberate misconduct on the part of the patient”(135).

Unfortunately, the positive consequences of divorce are not very abundant. One study notes that, after divorce, many children establish strong bonds with their biological mothers, especially daughters. Children of divorce also tend to do better academically and have reduced internalizing and externalizing problems due to an authoritative non-custodial father (Amato 1278-1280). Parents can help make the situation a more positive one by helping the child comprehend the new living setup, and eventually to accept it. Becoming familiar with a child’s emotional structure or the framework for which one acts and grows. The task becomes easier as parents understand more fluently how their children come to understand their surroundings at various stages of childhood (Berger 7-12).

Another action expressed through defense mechanisms is anger. Adults often find this emotion hard to comprehend. Due to their inexperience, young children don’t particularly know how to direct their anger at the right target. The custodial parent, the most observable parent, tends to receive most of this misdirected anger. Children are more likely to vent their anger at the parent with whom they feel more stable. They do this because they can’t deal with the situation in a reasonable manner. Divorce leaves the children with feelings of anger and confusion. These feelings don’t usually stem from the distaste for one parent, but rather from the stress caused by the situation. As the child grows to understand the situation more, strong feelings of anger will decline (Berger 133-134).

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