There were many different aspects of John Updike’s “Separating” that I enjoyed. The focus on what a modern day family is like, the character development of Richard, and the reversal of male and female stereotypes to name a few. However, I decided to focus my paper on the three different conflicts Richard, the protagonist of the story, encounters.
The first conflict is between Richard and his wife Joan. Their marriage has been falling apart and they don’t seem to even enjoy each other’s company anymore. The whole basis of the story is around this couple’s separation. It is never made clear the exact reason for the dissolution of the marriage. IT is hinted that Richard might have been having an affair. But, whatever the reason, it is made known that it is Richard’s decision to leave. After the blowout at the dinner table, where three out of the four children learn about the separation, Joan says that “it really wasn’t fair. It’s your idea, and you make it look as though I was kicking you o
The last, and most important conflict in this story is between Richard and himself. Throughout the story he has a very hard time controlling his emotions. He cries at the dinner table and in the car with Dickie. He tells his wife that he wishes he could undo his mistakes and start over. He really does not want to leave because he’s realized that leaving is harder than staying. He has thought that the separation was the easy way out of his problems, but it turns out to be much harder that he thought. Richard also feels guilty about abandoning his children. He confesses to Dickie that he hates the whole situation and admits “my father would have died before doing it to me” (p 836). He believes that he is being a terrible father. After Dickie asks his father why his parents are separating, Richard realizes that he had forgotten the reason. He doesn’t remember why he once wanted to get out of the marriage so badly.
None of the conflicts are ever really resolved in the story. Updike leaves the reader
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