The fictional author of Dostoevsky's Notes From Underground claims that he has all the traits of the anti-hero. He torments others out of spite; he is weak, petty, and spineless. His intelligence and self-proclaimed disease of hyperconsciousness have made him nihilistic; he is unable to believe in himself and has reasoned himself into inaction. Peterson states that nihilism is one logical evil consequence of heightened self-consciousness. This character had done what Buddha wanted to when he first faced the tragic awareness of mortality, and could no longer enjoy life's pleasures, that is to withdraw himself from the world, suffer and do nothing. This character has retired to his underground, where he avoids reality and fantasizes about a life, all the while unable to do anything productive for himself. He describes himself as a hyperconscious mouse that has reasoned past his motivations and can no longer believe in his own actions. Embittered by inaction, the mouse then creates around itself "a fatal brew, a stinking mess of doubts and unsettled questions. Then filled with half despair, half belief, he consciously buried himself alive for grief in the underworld for forty years, in hyperconsciousness and doubtful hopelessness, in the hell of his unsatisfied desires. With time, the self-generated swamp grows increasingly impenetrable as the consequences of long-term avoidance propagate. This man does seem to embody all things unheroic. But I would argue that parts of the revolutionary hero could also be seen in this character.
Peterson, in his epic book entitled Maps of Meaning, explains that "voluntary movement toward the good would mean reintegration of cast-off material, voluntary incorporation of what is indigestible" (pg. 332). I think this is hat Dostoevsky's character is attempting to do in the second half of this novel. He has decided to confront the memories that he was afraid of, and do so with complete honesty.
