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Distrust Between the Sexes - Karen Horney

 

            "Disappointments in our love life ": Horney's: "The Distrust between the Sexes ".
             In Karen Horney's "The Distrust between the Sexes " she explains psychological reasons between women/men, to distrust people of the opposite sex because the two genders might have expectations for each other. Three main aspects that lead up to the expectations between the sexes are lack of communication, childhood affects and the longings for happiness. For a relationship to be at best, communication is the main key for having that. Not only do most couples want a long relationship with happiness but the expectations that they have for a happy relationship is high. Children in this world grow up to believe that being in a relationship with the opposite sex is an automatic happiness, but not only do they grow up believing that, they would expect marriage coming of the relationship just like their parents, only if they are still together for a long time. Horney specifically wrote about these aspects because all of them do come up in relation to each other, whether it is boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife or even children/parents. .
             In the beginning of the essay, Horney writes "The relationship between men and women have a lot going on such as trusting each other, keeping hostile, but trying to keep that avoidable, and loving each other unconditionally. A child and a parent are very similar to men and women because a parent does not stop loving their child and always has to keep an eye out on what they do and how he/she do them. This all connects to communication. Lack of communication is the worst possible thing that can happen in a relationship. This can be resolved by talking to each other about their problems instead of ignoring them because that just makes things worse. On the other hand, Horney writes "we all have natural fear of losing ourselves in another person ", by this she says hostility is the cause of the communication problem.


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