There is an element of fear that pervades an authoritarian household. Much like an authoritarian government, there is compliance with rules, but the compliance is typically not out of love. Even worse, the punishments often result in withholding love and affection from the children. As a result, the children begin to learn that they are loved and accepted for what they do, rather than for who they are. This is the root of poor self-esteem because they arent taught the inherent value of just being themselves.
What is the food for the soul that these children lack? In the documentary called Happy, directed, written, and co-produced by Academy Award nominated filmmaker Roko Belic, the film crew travels around the world to visit places where people have been shown to live long, happy lives . One section of the film visits with residents who live in one of Denmarks popular co-housing communities. Denmark has repeatedly been found to be one of the happiest nations in the world. The film shows a community of several families who are living together. They each have their own small private rooms but share large living and dining spaces where they interact as one large family. They have a large kitchen where families rotate the work of preparing meals and cleaning up afterward. They have large outdoor areas for the children to play, and there are also a large garden where they grew some of their food. One person they interview is a single mom with two daughters. She appears happy and incredibly grateful for being able to find such a community and calls it home. Living in a group home has taken many burdens away from her. She used to have to cook dinner every night after coming home from work. But in the group home she only had to cook twice a month. Even the job of shopping was shared by families making more time for relaxation and social interaction with friends and family during the evening.
