This is why she is so confident that Chris will send her a letter. However, if she had examined his prior actions, Edie could have come to the conclusion that there would be no letter. For example, when she goes to see him in his tent and he begins to kiss her, she justifies him saying "and he did some other things, not bad things or not in a bad way."" Although he admirably didn't allow himself to go all the way with Edie, he overstepped his boundaries by kissing her at all. Chris' unfaithfulness to his fiancée should have been a warning sign to Edie, but she continued to see him through rose colored glasses because she was disillusioned by her infatuation. The desired reality Edie creates for herself makes it difficult for her to differentiate between what she wants to happen and what is really happening.
The older Edie, on the other hand, has some different ideas about Chris. She does still respect and admire him to a certain extent, as we see when she describes how his attitude toward her didn't change when he found out she was the hired girl. However, she does have reservations toward him. The older Edie uses phrases like "it upset me so- and "I was so ashamed- when she describes their encounters, which shows that she did not feel comfortable with Chris. She also displays regret for having let him kiss her when she says, "I can't ever let myself think about [his kisses]."" She wants to forget about it because she wishes it had never happened, possibly because she now realizes his unfaithfulness to his fiancée. Thus far, older Edie's attitude toward Chris is somewhat negative; not necessarily that she thinks he is a bad person, but more that she knows he was not the right person for her. This can be seen in the way she never says anything negative about him personally, but she, on several occasions, expresses not-so-positive things about the way she feels around him.
