I wouldn't describe her as strictly beautiful. She knocked me out, thoughShe was the only one, outside of my family, that I ever showed Allie's baseball mitt to, with all the poems written on itShe was interested in that kind of stuff," (79). Here, Holden reveals that he trusted Jane with stories of his dead brother, Allie, who he seldom spoke about to anyone. This shows that Holden felt extremely secure in this relationship. Moreover, Holden also talks a lot about how much her age intrigued him. He admired how innocent and benign their relationship was. Holden recalls, "I mean she was quite young and all, and most girls if you see them putting their hand on the back of somebody's neck, they're around twenty-five or thirty, and usually they're doing it to their husband or their little kid-I do it to my kid sister Phoebe once in a while, for instance. But if a girl is quite young and all, and she does it, it's so pretty it just about kills you," (80). Here, it can be seen by Holden's words that there is something about the way young people are that "kills him". It is almost as if Holden wants to protect Jane's innocence, because it is where he feels the most comfortable with her. It is clear that Holden's relationship with Jane as a child was completely secure. However, now that both have grown up, things are extremely different in the way Holden view's he and Jane's relationship.
Now that Jane and Holden have gone their separate ways and have lost touch for many years now, Holden views their relationship as the complete opposite of what it used to be. He knows that he was attached to Jane, and most likely still is. However, this scares Holden, and so he chooses to avoid the relationship all together. In the beginning of the novel, Holden discovers that his roommate, Stradlater, is going on a date with Jane, who he hasn't seen in years. Ever since this occurs, Holden becomes extremely jealous of Stradlater and cannot get Jane off of his mind.
