Her mother divorced her father when she was 4 years old and she resents her mother's decision to break her family up. Now that she is older she can understand her mother's decision, but during her teen years she hated her father for not being there and was upset with her mother for not trying to make it work. Janice knew that her mother divorced her father because of infidelity in their relationship and seeing her mother cry affected her much more than she ever realized. Growing up in a predominantly black community, Janice had trouble relating to her fellow black classmates. Janice wanted to be white and did everything she could to remove herself from her black roots. Janice describes her community as poor blacks' trapped in the system. Janice lives in a predominantly black neighborhood in South Central, California. Over the years the demographics have changed and it's about 65% black and about 30% Hispanic. .
Janice was about 12 years old when her body began developing; she noticed men in a sexual way. Janice describes this time as very difficult and uncomfortable time, which still plagues her to some degree today. At home her father constantly told me I was fat and would have to be pushed through the door by the time I was 18. My grandfather would yell at me to take off the shorts or whatever else I happened to be wearing. The only people who seemed to think she was beautiful with nappy hair and large hips, thighs, and buttocks were the boys who lived in the area. Because she did not have a great relationship with her father, she didn't trust men. Janice leaned close to her Christian beliefs for guidance. Janice was involved in church activities, she believed that sexual activity before marriage was forbidden, and she was determined to not fall into the trap like some of her friends. It was also at 12 years old that she understood the pain from lying and cheating that my father imposed on my mother, caused a lot of hurt inside her.