"She was certain he had a future" 751, but she wasn't so sure she had one. Her husband didn't intend on taking his wife's identity away, but he did. She didn't feel anything. In this story she is continually distraught over her secret, yet she is continually drawn to the man she shares the secret with. One January day she even cuts herself with a razor blade "to see what it would do" 751. Not to commit suicide as one might think, but to see if she still feels. She wonders if she can even feel physical pain, because she is so detached from herself. She has no internal love for her being. She has no outward love for her husband. All she knows is that she has a conflict in her soul over a man she is not supposed to be with. .
She continues to see her lover. He comes to visit, and they meet at hotels and pretend they are something they are not. She perceives that they are aging, and with the age of their bodies, so is the relationship between them growing older. The words are growing stale. The torment of her shame leaves her feeling numb, and she can even contemplate murder. Just to rid herself of her guilt, and of her love. .
The story contains several flashbacks, often bouncing back to her husband attempting to make clumsy, angry love to her after she sees her lover at the theater. She can't receive her husbands love either. She doesn't love herself. In the midst of the story, she flashes back to the time when her lover and she first met, and when they first made love. It jumps forward from that point to the climax of the story. They are in a hotel room, and her lover finally makes her realize why she feels the way she does. "Look, it's you. You"re the one who doesn't want to get married. You lie to me 759. "You love me but you won't marry me, because you want something left over" She wants security. She wants that back up love to build up her self-esteem. He continues to say "All your life you can attribute your misery to me, to our not being married - you are using me-" 760.