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"The Bad Relationship: Why It Is Best To Leave -

             There is a wise saying out there that states ninety per cent of our happiness or misery depends on whom we marry. I read it, took note and a decade married a fabulous man. I did not realize at the time I was in the minority.
             Relationships have and most likely will always be an important and often rewarding part of our lives. They exist on many levels, meet many needs, and provide meaning to our life pursuits. They also cause us frustration, distress, worry and heartache and how we recognize and strengthen the healthy ones is not always easy. Professionals estimate that more than 70 percent of us experience problem relationships. .
             Have you ever wondered what exactly a healthy relationship looks like? If you don't know, it will be very challenging for you to create it.
             Healthy relationships are grounded in honesty, respect, trust and support, negotiation and fairness, shared responsibility and independence, communication and non-threatening behavior. When in one, you feel secure and comfortable, treat each other with respect and communicate clearly and openly. You have more good times than bad.
             In an unhealthy relationship, one or both of you are overly possessive or get jealous about petty behavior, try to control or manipulate the other and make them feel badly about him/her self. You care for and focus on the other person only and neglect yourself and/or feel pressure to change to meet that other person's standards. .
             And then there is the extreme: abusive relationships, which materialize in four types; each is as detrimental as the next. Verbal abuse includes name-calling, critical comments, threats or lies. Emotional abuse consists of such controlling behavior as jealousy, intimidation, criticism, and in general, making the other person feel weak. Sexual abuse relates to sexual coercion or assault, whilst physical abuse involves you guessed it, pushing, striking, choking, restraining, and the like.

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