There is a difference between "being in love" and "loving": "being in love" is a kind of madness, involving unrealistic perceptions and ideals, whereas "loving" is more realistic and usually longer-term. However, even "loving" is still based in our needs. Therefore, there is no such thing as purely altruistic love. Critically discuss these claims about love.
What is Love?.
The dictionary lists some two dozen meanings of the word "love". People seem to have their own definitions where love is concerned, many emotional conflicts and relational dynamics make simple definitions difficult.
Love has often been characterized as an ambivalent feeling v/s A blissful joy when one is with the beloved and a painful "sickness" and "torture" when lovers are separated.
Freud (1905) looks at love from the perspective of the sexual drive. According to him love as well as sexuality is rooted in infancy. A persons first love object is the mother. The mother's breast provides the infant not only with nourishment but also a source of sexual pleasure which he will later seek from his adult lover (for girls, the object of love somehow later becomes the father). Freud views adult love and sexuality as an extension (or rediscovery) of their infantile forms. Furthermore, Freud viewed love as the co-existence of "two currents" tenderness/affection and sensuality. Happy love is a fusion of these two currents.
Sometimes love is seen as selfless giving, sometimes as selfish clinging and self centeredness, some love is conditional as stated by Fromm's "fathers love" where it is said. "I'll love you if you dont talk backstay a virginaccept my values" or unconditional love Fromm's "Mothers love" where "I will love you regardless of what you do because you are my son, daughter, father, brother, friend".
Love is not primarily a relationship to a specific person; it is an attitude, an orientation of character which determines the relatedness of a person to the world as a whole not toward one "object" of love.